Friday, February 28, 2014

Blonde Again

Blonde Again

No. 1 - My marriage ended about 5 years ago. The first two years were hell, but my ex-husband, Jeff, and I found places we connect again.  In most cases this connection occurs with both cars and children. When a car or a child breaks down we are there to help each other pick up the pieces.

No.2 - I was diagnosed with Uterine Cancer.

No. 3 - I started online dating

I had an online date with a fellow in Richmond whose online name was ThinkPositive2.  His real name was Rolfe.  Over the course of a week we had spoken on the phone several times and had seen each others pictures, online.  We set a date, a Thursday in late January, for lunch.Thursday morning my car broke down, it needed a new head gasket and so I needed a new car.  
Luckily Jeff had a Toyota truck that I could borrow so that I could keep my date with Rolfe.  I headed off towards Richmond, as I rolled off I64 the clutch started slipping and by the time I had reached the first stop light on Broad Street the clutch was totally gone.  I put on my hazards and sat in the right lane of the rd, two men stopped and helped me push the car in to a Target parking lot.

I called Rolfe to explain the situation, during our phone conversation I suddenly remembered that I had cut and dyed my hair that week and that I no longer looked my profile picture on OK Cupid.  Rolfe was going to be looking for a woman with shoulder length blonde hair and I was now a woman with short brown hair. I simply told him to drive to Target and look for the woman with the broken down truck wearing biker boots.

Rolfe arrived in an old yellow volvo wearing a little cap to cover his bald spot.  He was about 5'10 and roundish with dark hair and glasses.  A total nerd.  It was love at first site. He had already called a mechanic and had the name of a tow company for me.  His mini van was in the same shop.  We connected in so many ways.  We went out for Chinese food.

I was calling friends and frantically looking for a place to stay in Richmond for the night.  Rolfe told me he would love to have my company at his place and that he had an extra room.  When we pulled up to his house he explained to me that his parents were visiting.  we just sat in the driveway of his house in the old yellow volvo not speaking.  Finally I told him that most peoples parents liked me and in we went.

Betsy and John were not the type of people who shook hands.  They hugged me and I felt like a cast member on Seseme street surrounded by their jovialness.Then they offered me wine, which was not like Seseme street and I drank heartily.Betsy and John were unitarians but active with the Quakers as well. They spent the year traveling between Richmond and New Hampshire visiting Rolfe and his brother.Rolfe, it turns out is a direct descendant of Pocohantus.  His parents and I talked about activism, family and theater.  I fell in love with them.  Betsy and John were exactly what a single parent with cancer needed.  I spent the night in the guest room.  The next morning which was Friday, Betsy and John made me coffee and breakfast.

The truck wasn't ready.  Rolfe suggested I stay again Fri night. 

Saturday, the truck still wasn't ready.I planned on staying the day, the truck needed a new fly wheel as well as a clutch, we were waiting on the parts.  Rolfe is in a band called  the Hullabaloos and he had band practice Saturday afternoon. Betsy asked me to go with her to the thrift store. I was hesitant, I didn't have much money, I had come prepared for a mere lunch date on Thurs., but I was too embarrassed to tell becky that and she was so excited about the idea of shopping together. I went.I acted like a very picky thrifted and came back to Rolfes with only a pair of black platform boots to show for my 4 hour excursion. I was on the phone with Jeff and the mechanic all day.  The parts never came in.I stayed Saturday night.  This time I didn't sleep in the guest room.

Sunday came, I needed to get back home.Rolfe and I had a game of Thrones marathon on Sunday and I met his kids.
As evening rolled around Jeff and the kids drove from Afton to retrieve me.  Jeff showed up at Rolfes with all three kids, Betsy and John invited them in. My oldest, Fiona, refused to get out of the car.  Jeff came in and he and Becky recognized each other from some peace activist work they had done together.  Jeff sat down at the kitchen table with her and drank coffee, John showed the boys around the house.  Rolfe and I sat in the kitchen next to each other.  I drank wine.

The truck was finally ready by the next Friday and Jeff drove me back to Rolfes to pick it up. I stayed with Rolfe and his parents again for the weekend.  It went like this for a few months.  I bought a new car, a little white honda civic.  Rolfes mini van was finally fixed. Betsy and John took care of me while I was very sick, I talked to Rolfe recently and he says he thinks of me at Valentines Day because I sat at his kitchen table with my craft supplies and made 100's of valentines.

Rolfe eventually broke up with me.  It bothered him that I spent so much time with Jeff.  By then my hair had grown out and I looked like my profile picture.  I was blonde again.